stronger than ever before
. I was a very positive yet very negative person with myself not very honest about my feelings or how I felt. I hid my pain, or the things that would make me mad. I justify all my hurt, Very insecure, I dislike myself. I didn’t believe in myself or my abilities, hurt, I felt like i wasn’t good enough, or never will be enough, compared myself to others. I try to shield behind because i was scared to get hurt more, I was lonely, i didn’t wanna get hurt by someone i loved. But I had tons of dreams and passion, a constant fight between myself because you can’t be a positive person when you dislike yourself and have so many negative things. When I was given red love I was color blind i couldn’t take it.
Now is different, I got my fire again but stronger. I feel like I am burning with dreams and faith. I have tons of things I gonna do and dreams that are coming true, I got my painting on shops, my photos on shows. I am so surprise when people ask me for photo shoots, or tutorial for drawing
I believe in myself a lot, I know that maybe I might fail but i try my best, I am very honest about my feelings now, I don;t wanna hide what i feel, i wanna express, I am not lonely at all, i have god, my family and my friends. and new friends I am making on my way. I have conquer many places already, while dancing at night at the park, sitting down on the back of a car, looking and counting stars, or going to soccer games chasing after soccer player, or running all over downtown for a photoshoot, or riding your bike in main street, while singing outloud, takin selfies at a busy rush and the people on the back making faces, learning new stuff from amazing photographer or supporting jeckpack,or staying sleeping at the beach, or getting on the biggest rollercoster, while beating everyone at air hockey, and racing a gtr. against a tesla. or almost getting in trouble for taking a photo, or getting attack by butterflies or being call becky, or pretending you are not from here, while your nephew is learning how to turn, while talking photos of expesive homes, or working on a new car shop, while eating at agora, or katz, or hitting a new concert at the blue or you ,making your own concert at the public hall of the museum while loving houston with your mother, while packing for a new journey, while being on the chase building in downtown toproof with a telescope with my friends with music, food and pillows,or going to car meets in dallas, while drinking some coffeee and leaving a new paint off I RATHER DO ALL THAT IN A MONTH than going clubbing or drinking
,I love my chunky self. Im unique, a darn goofball, that gravity is way too much for me. I make my own words haha! XD. I am like no other.
I have learn to forgive, and like them unconditional. Now i know that no matter how much or i wish i could hate i can’t I ain’t that kind of person. I don’t wanna be like that, i refused, I am the type of person that give chances, that gives the benefit of the doubt, i don’t judge people, because were they are now is not what they gonna be in a years from now. We are still are a process in the making, I might not agree with you but that doesn’t mean we can’t be friends, we might not be the same but we can still be friends as long as i know my faith and I don”t changed.
I can’t wait to fall in love with someone who will fill me more with fire, with passion. someone who will support my vision and me support his vision. Someone that want me to triumph and help me just as i want to support him everytime he feels he can’t. someone who isn’t afraid to ,make mistake but is willing to admit them . someone who had faith and believe, someone who can go on adventures with me, but also have lazy days. Someone who doesn’t care what people think about us being silly. Someone who can be a gentlemen, someone that i can trust, someone , i can be friend with, someone who i can fly with. so we can be a team.